ryancrobert:

you can just tell that Nicki Minaj is the kind of person that when you’re telling a story and everyone else in the group is talking over you, she’s making direct eye contact with you and paying extra attention so that you don’t get discouraged and stop mid-story

(via shaggiusmaxime)

puppymother:

in grade 11 i was on the phone w this boy i wanted and i owed him a favour or something so i was like “it can be anything you want” and he was like “anything?” and im like ya thats what i fuckin said and he goes “can you explain to me how a fridge works? like how does it stay cold”

(via secretstokeepnoonetotell)

jykinturah:

kimpossibooty:

professoroakofficial:

isaacjamess:

One of the best out takes from any television show, ever. 

HE FUCKING STRAIGHT-FACED THAT

This man is a guardian of the galaxy

you can just see the split second where everyone is processing what he said

(Source: prekrasnoe-mngnovenie, via secretstokeepnoonetotell)

dannnylawrence:

unlimitedgoats:

luxvriously:

My anaconda will consider it

My anaconda has, upon review of the information presented with it’s partners, decided that it, in fact, does not. My anaconda apologizes for any inconvenience this may cause and thanks you for your time.

Re: Your Anaconda,

Thank you for your consideration. Please keep my cover letter and resume in your files in case of any future openings. Good luck in all future endeavors.

Yours, etc.
A bunless hun

(via kelsoyourtheking)

cocaineteas:

Me when I see a boy that I like…

(via trickpapi)